uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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