these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
