His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
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