I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize