I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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