you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize