The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
