Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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