He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Are we still banned from the library?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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