Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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