i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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