All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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