im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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