If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
