gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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