I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
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