just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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