so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize