I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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