You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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