its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Someone came in the potted fern
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
