and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize