the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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