I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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