Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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