Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
