a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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