PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
