# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Couch. On fire.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
