Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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