Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Are we still banned from the library?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize