I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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