then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
