I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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