I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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