i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
