tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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