Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
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