Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
