My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize