I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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