biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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