My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
