What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
