Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
