somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
