Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize