Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize