so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
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Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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