bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
